"Waddya mean I've had one gin-soaked mouse too many!"
Me: "I see scientists have finally found a way to stop mice with a drinking problem falling off the wagon."
Me: "This article here. It says scientists have found a way to stop mice with a drinking problem falling off the wagon."
Co-worker: "That's ridiculous. Why would scientists give mice alcohol in the first place?"
Me: "Are you saying mice shouldn't be given alcohol? Because that seems a bit harsh."
Co-worker: "Well, where else are mice going to get alcohol from? Answer me that!"
Me: "Home brewing."
Co-worker: "Home brewing?"
Me: "Home brewing. Think about it; if I was a small creature whose sole purpose in life was to be a tasty snack for larger animals, I'd be permanently pissed as well. What do you think?"
Co-worker: "I think we're both lucky the Boss is away this week."
A political post.
When I stop screaming and punching holes in things.